1. MIX with your people. Get to know them and listen to them.
2. WANT the best for them; have a vision for them, even if they can’t see this vision for themselves.
3. SHOW that you care for them; be transparent with your emotions.
4. HELP them with their problems. Do something for them they cannot do themselves.
5. WHEN they reveal their confidence in you and your vision–
6. INVITE them deeper and higher, GIVE them ownership and responsibility.

The simple power of these six steps calls for deep meditation:

MIX: Who are your people? When/where/how are you regularly mixing with them.

I’m beginning with my own immediate family. Beyond that, I’m not sure. But I know that ‘Mixing’ requires listening, setting aside my own agenda. It requires at least three people in conversation and is best done over food.

WANT: What is your vision for your people? How are you giving them glimpses of your vision?

Mixing with people is not enough. I need to have a vision of them and their future. The vision must be simple, clear, powerful and good.

SHOW: How strong are your emotions for your people? What emotions do you let them see from you? When and where do you show your emotions?

I’m shy. I tend to hold my emotions back from the people that I love the most. Why? There is much power in sharing genuine feelings.

HELP: What challenges, frustrations and concerns do your people have What skills and resources are you willing to employ to help your people?

My vision is not a vision of me. It’s a vision of them. Change begins at ground-level. Below ground-level. Exceptional leadership is about getting my hands dirty. Where are my people stuck?

WHEN: Do you have enough humility to accept the confidence of your people? Can you be vulnerable enough to lead their hearts?

All other steps have been things that I can do. This step requires vulnerability. I must not close myself off in an ivory tower. I must be humble enough and brave enough to give opportunites for my people to speak their allegiance. This, I feel, is the scariest step of all!

INVITE/GIVE: Do you have a simple ‘method’ for your people to follow? Can you give specific tasks that are tailored to the abilities of individuals?

I need to be able to package my vision in simple, practical, day-to-day terms. The power comes, not from the grandness of high concept, but from ordinary, human interactions and habits.